When we arrived at the doctors' office this morning they had a letter waiting for us from our donor's family.
"For you, that received a gift from Jorge:
Through this letter we want to express that even with the painful experience of having lost our son, we are pleased that you received his precious gifts, because now you can now have a second chance of life.
Jorge was a boy very beloved, and with a big heart, with very good feelings, cheerful character and with luck and sympathy. And we hope that all these features are in your life, so he not only gave you one gift but all of these too.
PS If you want to know more about Jorge or to communicate with us, you are welcome."
They enclosed a picture. He was a handsome young man, with curly dark hair and eyes that spectacular yellow-brown that people try to imitate with contact lenses. A sweet smile. Beautiful eyebrows.
I haven't written yet to thank his parents and I'm not sure why. I'm glad now that I haven't - we were told Babygirl's donor was a young woman, so his parents would have wondered if we sent the letter to the right place.
I want to send them an entire photo album, the whole story, a link to this blog and an invitation to dinner. I want to tell them all about Babygirl and how her life has improved because of the gift Jorge gave her. I want her story to make it all all right for them....and I know it can't. It can't possibly. As sad as I have been for them, I'm immeasurably sadder now that I can SEE what they have lost, and it's still NOTHING at all compared to their suffering. Babygirl is all of the things Jorge was: "very beloved, and with a big heart, with very good feelings, cheerful character and with luck and sympathy." And by the grace of God and the miracle of Jorge's gift, she is still here with us.
Of COURSE I want to know more about Jorge. I want to hear anything they want to tell me about him, his hopes, his dreams, his gifts and talents. I want too let them know that he won't be forgotten, ever. Ever.
I read the letter to Babygirl, and showed her the picture, and suddenly it clicked in her mind. "He's dead?" "Yes, baby. His mom and dad knew he was going to die and decided to donate his organs to people like you who need them." "That's sad!" "Yes. Yes it is."
It's a lot for a 12 year old to take in. I'm not sure it's all there yet. And truly, when all is said and done, how can any of us understand it all?