Generally speaking, I don't believe in germs. I mean, really? Okay, so I get a cold here and there, and the odd UTI. But on a day-to-day basis I really can't afford to believe in germs. After all, I'm a doctor, and if I believed in them I'd be exposed to about a bajillion of the little suckers EVERY DAY! And that would mean I'd be sick all the time!!
This philosophy is, sadly, reflected in my housekeeping. I really don't see dust (I know, usually a male trait, but hey). Moving the couch to hunt for dust bunnies? Why not just let 'em mature and scoot out on their own? And I truly believe in the "Ten Second Rule." My kids routinely chanted, "God made dirt and dirt don't hurt!" when we were out camping.
But now I am being forced to believe. Those dialysis Grinches keep hounding us on the subject, making me actually LOOK for germs every single evening when I hook Babygirl up to her machine. "Is the fluid clear???" And they make me check again in the morning. "What's her temperature?" Okay, so they aren't actually here, but we have to write this stuff down on a flow chart every day. And a part of me thinks, "If we look hard enough, we're gonna find those germs!"
So now, all of a sudden, at the age of fifty-three I have to become a good housekeeper. No, a great housekeeper. A germophobic housekeeper! To quote Babygirl, "O M G." I have to develop a system.
I should have been well trained for this. My Mom was the Queen of System. I have no idea how she did what she did - she raised us, worked (part time when we were little and full time later, and that was third shift), and kept a very tidy house. She really did have a schedule of some sort fixed in her head, and it included things that still mystify me. I mean really, wash the windows? Six times a YEAR?
I am trying to visualize all of that. Trying to figure out why I didn't inherit The System. I mean, I know my Mom was a much younger mom than I am, but come on! How hard can it be?
Sigh. Hard. Really hard. I am at the office nine hours Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. Wednesdays I have been spending managing doctor's appointments for me, Babygirl, and my Mom. I also dedicate time to managing our finances, and negotiating with insurance companies, and grocery shopping. I do two loads of laundry daily (and we have a double loader, so make it four). Hubby and I both prep and cook depending on the day.
Saturday has become cleaning day. I used to do things like go skiing, read books, catch up on Facebook...... Now? I am working on a system. Each and every room was truly in desperate need of a deep cleaning, the kind where you empty the closet and scrub the shelves. This has been done. Now it's upkeep. And I keep noticing things I didn't see before, fingerprints on door frames, the thick trail of grime on the stairway wall. I think I was happier when I didn't SEE this stuff. So each time I clean, it actually takes a little LONGER, because I am being more thorough.
I am experimenting with cleaning products, figuring out which things are easiest to use, most cost effective, and best at killing our invisible enemy. And I am seeing, truly seeing, why this is so important. I expected her to have some trouble AFTER the transplant. After all, then they will be deliberately suppressing her immune system, and the germs will definitely have the home court advantage. What I never expected was how susceptible she'd be NOW, just because her kidneys aren't working.
Babygirl had four years of perfect attendance in elementary school. Rarely had a sniffle, caught the occasional strep throat and recovered in a day. But here in her first year of middle school she has missed six days of school due to illness. And she has a cold again now, her third so far this year. No one else in the house has been sick at all.
This enemy is ugly. Relentless. Deadly.
I guess I'm a believer now.
DeeDee
Hoping & praying for you & your family.
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