The Lighter Side of the Journey.....

You can't complete a four hundred mile round trip journey without running into at least one moment of complete, well, idiocy. 

Babygirl LOVES Perkin's Restaurants, and there are none locally.  We do, however, regularly pass at least one on our journey, and it has become our lunch-on-the-way-home place.  They are the only place I know that will serve French toast with a side of asparagus.

The first time we stopped there, Babygirl ordered pancakes.  When they arrived, she was delighted to discover that they come with a cute little scoop of ice cream on top.  Before I could intervene, she spooned the whole thing into her mouth, discovering just a moment too late that it was a cute little scoop of BUTTER.  I confess, for me it wouldn't have been a huge problem, but she is NOT a fan of butter at all.  Her face as she struggled for some polite way to rid herself of an entire mouthful of it was entertaining, at least from my side of the table.  We (I) still giggle about it, but she now usually remembers to ask for "No butter please."

Eating out with the two of us is challenging.  I have a severe food allergy to citrus, so lemons and oranges are an issue.  Since so very many restaurants casually toss lemon wedges into their ice water and orange twist garnishes onto random plates of food, I have to be very pro-active with wait staff.  And Babygirl cannot have any food that carries a germ contamination risk, so no raw veggies, garnishes, cold cuts or uncooked food of any kind.  And once again, since restaurants slam a piece of parsley onto anything for decoration, I have to be pretty aggressive about this as well.  I also have to instruct the wait staff that the kitchen staff MUST re-glove it they are switching from salad prep to Babygirl's plate. Perkin's usually has no problem at all accommodating this. Burger King is universally awesome. Some restaurants make us feel like circus freaks.

Yesterday's waitress was of the you-are-a-circus-freak variety.  As I was explaining my allergy, she interrupted with, "Well, you don't plan to ORDER any of that stuff, do you?"  Since lemon juice is a hidden ingredient in most salad dressings, salsas and marinades, I don't know unless you tell me whether or not I'm ordering a potential death sentence, but hey, I'll do my best not to inconvenience you.  When I began on Babygirl's list of issues she literally threw up her hands and said, "I'm going to get the manager."  Now, it's not unusual for a waitress to consult with the manager about our food problems - it happens all the time.  They just don't usually make such a production out of it. 

The manager arrived, and listened to our list of 'can't haves' as respectfully as he could given that the waitress kept demonstrating her IQ with additional questions.  The one question that REALLY made me drop my jaw was, "Well, you know we use RAW EGGS to make French toast!"  I simply stared at her in astonishment.

Um....... ALL food is raw before it is cooked.  I held back from saying so because just THINKING that thought seemed so stupid that I just could not bring myself to say it out loud. I had to forcibly pull my chin up and shut my mouth.  I didn't get a look at the manager's face, but he went to the kitchen to instruct the staff, so at least I know SHE wasn't doing it. 

My sense of humor was running on low before lunch.  By the time we arrived home, I could laugh about it, and Hubby just roared when I told him about it. 

But next time we stop, I'm not letting her wait on us.  She won't want to anyway.  She did not get a very good tip at all.

DeeDee