Wednesday, November 12, 2014

For the Heart's and Brain's Delight.....

Yesterday was a full-on all-day I-got-the-Scarecrow-beat Brain Day. 

WTH, you say?

It's difficult to explain the toll the migraines take.  People 'get' that when you have an actual headache, you aren't doing too well.  They kinda get that auras screw up blood flow to your brain and that can make you less functional.  They certainly understand that medications have side effects and can make you less focused. 

There's more to it, though, and it's more subtle and insidious.  Sometimes entire days go by when I feel like there is some kind of fine mesh curtain between me and what I know.  I can feel alert but unable to reach into certain parts of my brain for things I need by the usual routes.  It's a bit like having to drop the back seat of your car to get into the trunk - you know you can do it if you have to, but you try the trunk latch FIRST because that makes the most sense, and then when that doesn't work you have to go looking around for that latch release you never use and then grab a flashlight so you can see....and all of that is running in the background while you carry on the conversation as if a chunk of something isn't missing and waiting to be turned up.

I am at my best in the morning.  By one o'clock I can feel the fog roll in.  By four PM my brain is moving SO slowly that it puts all the big words away for another time.  By seven, hubby can beat me at nearly any game he chooses. 

But yesterday was an exceptional day.  Everything was clear, coherent, organized.  I managed to plough through a ton of paperwork, and what I didn't finish (there was plenty) I at least prioritized.  Despite an aura last night,  I feel about the same this morning.  I pray it lasts, but I'll enjoy what I have while I have it, and be grateful.


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